Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Extreme Weather Warning!

I would like to warn all my readers in the New Orleans, Louisiana and Mississippi area that a large hurricane, Katrina, is on the way and may make landfall as a Category 4-5 storm with catastrophic results. Keep tuned to weather broadcasts to inform yourselves of any possible danger.

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Katrina, Katrina, Where Ya Been so Long Tom!

There's life among the wreckage! For the calm after the storm Go read Tom Friedmans blast of hot air! Written in his wonderful "Praising Bush With Faint Damns" style, it's Tom at his hilarious best. If you're not registered, here's some of the fun:

"On the day after 9/11, I was in Jerusalem and was interviewed by Israeli TV. The reporter asked me, "Do you think the Bush administration is up to responding to this attack?" As best I can recall, I answered: "Absolutely. One thing I can assure you about these guys is that they know how to pull the trigger."

It's just too bad they didn't look to see which way the gun was aiming! And of course, Tom's still proud of helping pull that trigger. Creative destruction and all.
I'll bet he never thought Islamic Zionism would be so easy!

But there's comfort for the victims of Katrina, too. So they know they didn't die in vain, that they, yes, died for a "noble cause":

"Well, the party is over. If Mr. Bush learns the lessons of Katrina, he has a chance to replace his 9/11 mandate with something new and relevant. If that happens, Katrina will have destroyed New Orleans, but helped to restore America."

Granma's carcase may be an "alligator MRE" as Steve Gilliard says but it's all good if Bush gets a bump in the polls! And Gee, Mr Friedman, what could that "something new and relevant" be? "Something" close to martial law in a third world country. Considering what the survivors of the hurricane have to wade through, we could just call it a "turd world country" At least we'll have Mr Friedman around to polish that turd, as long as it's Bush who's shitting on us.

Here's some of that "Praising with faint damns" I mentioned:

"Well, if 9/11 is one bookend of the Bush administration, Katrina may be the other. If 9/11 put the wind at President Bush's back, Katrina's put the wind in his face. If the Bush-Cheney team seemed to be the right guys to deal with Osama, they seem exactly the wrong guys to deal with Katrina

Uh, Tom, they didn't get Osama either, he's gone with the wind. But we can pretend they were the "right guys", can't we Tom?

Along the way he explains why your taxes should be raised cause of Katrina, but not his, and leaves us with one more of those P. W. F. Damns.'s he loves:

"If Mr. Bush goes back to his politics as usual, he'll be thwarted at every turn. Katrina will have destroyed a city and a presidency."

Damn. And he was doing so well before Katrina, pulling those triggers and being the right guys to deal with Osama and all.

Go read the whole thing, if your blood pressure is as low as Katrina's barometer, otherwise you might get a severe tropical depression. But I wish Tom would dry up and blow away!